I have a bad habit, which is worry about a bunch of problems or issues that I will face in the near future, and then I will typically assume the worst possible outcome. I tell myself that I do this habitual practice so that I am fully prepared and not taken off guard. Stoicism even encourages to prepare yourself by anticipating a bad outcome. Sometimes, doing this negative anticipation and loading my plate with a bunch of stressful issues at once, has served me well – at least this has helped me prepare on a couple of occasions and not be taken by surprise. More often than not though, loading my plate with stressors and anticipating bad outcomes has resulted in suffering in the present, even if I knew the outcomes were going to be bad. This practice results in double suffering: right now in my mind (dreading the future outcome), and then suffering again when things actually turn out bad as I predicted.
There are two practices that I am trying to do in order to counteract overwhelming myself with stress. The first is following a recovery slogan called “First things first.” How it works, is that I will focus on one issue at a time. If I can, I try to focus on an action that I can take today, limiting my focus to only one of the issues (perhaps the issue that needs the most attention), therefore not facing the brunt of a bunch of concerning issues. I must admit, it is very hard to avoid overwhelming myself with stressing about future things, which results in going into full blown panic or despair.
The other thing that I try to do is called “one day at a time’. This slogan is also popular in support groups for addictions and other issues. Following this slogan means that I just focus on today only, and not look far into the future. This sometimes even means to live moment by moment. Examples of this are numerous and depend on some of the primary issues a person is facing. For the alcoholic, it may indicate that, right now, I will not drink. For the person riddled with a bucket of stressful things, it may mean to just to accomplish what you can today and not focus on tomorrow. It can also mean to put focus on the positives (the good aspects of your life right now), without focusing on what tomorrow may bring (I will discuss this in my next post).
Life can be very overwhelming and stressful. Sometimes, we can’t fully escape from the stress, but we can take measures to handle that stress differently than we have, and more productively. Also, be sure to remember that it is never a good idea to face life’s stress alone, to try to find some support to get you through those tough times, and perhaps provide some insight that you may not be able to see because your mind is too clouded with the stress.